No Donkeys

>> Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Ok, so no donkeys for us. Someone beat us to an offer on the house we wanted. It wasn't meant to be. So we decided to stay in the house we're in for a little while longer. At least until we find another house that's comparable to the house we're in which could take awhile. But we're ok with that. Our house does accomodate us very nicely. We'll get the elevator fixed and count our many blessings.

Speaking of blessings, we've had a two-year-old foster child that has been with us for a year that is leaving us this weekend. We've had many, many ups and downs with him. It will be bittersweet to see him go but we're ready. It's hard to put into words when a foster child leaves. You really can't understand it unless you've been through it yourself. Once you find out that a child is leaving you start disengaging yourself. You start preparing yourself mentally. You really have no choice. When they're in your care you see them as yours, you would do anything for them as if they're your own. But then you have to start loosening your grip on them, one finger at a time, regardless whether you like where they're going or not. Because you have no control anyway. All you can do is know that you did your best, pat yourself on the back and move on to the next child. That's all you do do. That and pray. Pray like mad for the rest of their lives. And sometimes that's my only hope that what I'm doing is worth it. I may be the ONLY one praying for them in the whole world. And if I hadn't fostered them, then I wouldn't have known they existed and therefore wouldn't have known to pray for them.

We're already praying for the next child to come along. And really, that's the best coping mechanism a foster parent has...looking forward to the next one. It's like Christmas really. The anticipation of what the next one is going to be like. Each one is like a gift. A precious gift waiting to be opened. I can't wait.


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